New Year

To be thwarted
by cold chance—
aborted
like the pinned hooves of a calf
that tried its best to be born
into the January weather
until it died,
like the splayed awkward legs of its mother
round and huge on her side
in the snow, torn
by tiny struggling hooves,
frozen beyond complaint of the cold
or the stiffness
of circumstance

To be caught in the if-ness,
to be left half
unborn, half-delivered when you die only proves
you have touched the world
you reached for

It's a new year
Now then
reach again